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Saturday, June 2, 2012

Living with Death.

Man, I hate deaths in the family.

You never realize how much it effects you until it happens.

It always comes as a shock,

and you realize that you'll never see that person again.

It also makes you reflect on the times

you did have with them and makes you wish

you spent more time with them or appreciated them more.

I know this is such a cliche but life really is too short.

Live every day of your life to the fullest,

even if it seems impossible to do.

I for one will try to take my own advice on this one as well.

Stop and smell the roses while you're at it too.

The people around you might not be there forever,

cherish every moment you have with them.

Tuesday, September 7, 2010

I'm posting because I want to post my thoughts today.

Change is necessary to life. Without change there would be no progression. I am currently undergoing change in my life and

although I don't fully agree with the change, I'm trying to adapt to it. Sometimes change is hard to adapt to simply because you are

not ready for it. Sometimes you make a leap of faith and hope to God that you're doing the right thing or something that will

aid you in the future. Chances like that require (or should require) a lot of thought before making it

because you can't go backwards.

As we live and we learn, change becomes second nature and we think less and less about what we are doing. We end up taking

blind leaps and things don't always go as well as it could have gone if we had thought and planned. Recently I had a night-long

conversation with a great friend of mine (Brendyn.) If you talk to me, you'll surely know who I'm talking about. We spoke about

taking these leaps of faith and he informed me about how the experience is far greater than any payoff. I completely agreed.

You'll either be a starving artist, or someone who hates what they're doing....but you'll have money. Now this isn't

always the case of course. There are a select few who can do what they love and make

a living from it.

Many people have told me that I have an artistic/analytical mind, which is true. I

get something in my head and analyze it

along with what I think the possibly outcomes will be, and what I think the ultimate

outcome will be. It's almost as if my mind

creates a multi-verse, branching out into the different possibilities and picking

the likely one. Most of the time I'm worrying

about something that hasn't happened or won't happen.

Thanks for the chat the other day, Brendyn.


Saturday, August 28, 2010

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Internet People IRL

Before Vidcon I knew who was going to be there that I really wanted to spend a lot of time with. The people I have known for years and never got an opportunity to meet were coming and I wanted to maximize my time to be with them.

Now, let me tell you something about me. I don't buy into hype that other people follow. If I hear something about someone or some group of people, I don't usually believe it until I see it myself.

That being said, I wanted to spend time with a few people I had never met but thought I knew well. One of them I had spent time with at another gathering and I thought we were pretty close.

After meeting this group, I tried to stay close to them because I knew this weekend was IT. The only time I know I'd be able to see them.

The group took off at random times, and the conversation I ended up having with them was never over 10 minutes long. When they left I was obviously not invited and I didn't see them for most of the event. It was always the group of 3. When I saw them I tried to get the attention of my "close friends" and was ignored most of the time.

Normally this won't bug me, except for the fact that before this we had a sort of bond. One where you know the other person and enjoy their company (online.)

Now there are two types of people I met. There was this one group and then the group who I will be happy to name off!

Toriano (DJTLaC) and Nikki (psush_girl) were some of the first people I ever really talked to on Toriano and I have had our ups and downs, and periods of time where we were angry at each other (over a person) and knew that our anger would not last forever. I won't get into that story, but you can check it on his blog.

We clicked almost immediately at Vidcon. They're the same people as they are online and as fun as ever. I enjoyed meeting them and hope to see them in the future.

As for the other group...I'll keep them at arm's length. Trust is big with me, I can't trust someone who say they want to spend time with me and when the opportunity presents itself they take off and do their own thing for the whole event.

They know exactly who they are. I don't think they should be ashamed of themselves, they are who they are. Just know that people notice little things like what you did at this event.


Day 1: I woke up, did somethings around town and prepared to be gone for a few days.

I drove out to the event and found out that parking was going to be some ridic price I can't pay. So I tried to find out who could pick me up from Venice.

I was trying to make this work because Faris/Kimmi had luggage at LAX and I would have to wait an hour and a half in order to be picked up. At this point I had been driving around LA looking for parking and was exhausted. I didn't want to do anything and was going to just go on home.

My will to do anything was shot due to the frustration and rage I had developed being constantly in traffic. I was convinced to turn back and Derek would pick me up from his place. So I drove around again looking for parking in that area and it wasn't much better than LA itself. I waited, waited waited and decided to text to find out where they were.

Hadn't left yet. Again I wanted to leave and just go home but was convinced to wait it out. Eventually I got picked up, did the quick trip to LAX and we were on our way.

I got to the event and went inside only to realize I left my phone in the car. I went back with the Valet slip to collect my phone. I could have just gone with the guy to grab it since I knew where it was but Mr Can't Speak English said to stay there. I waited over 2 hours to get my phone. I missed Audrey because apparently she was leaving as I was waiting.

Things just weren't going right for me at this point. I finally got up to the room and got situated with everything but it seemed like a recipe for disaster.

After that most of the event was awesome, my lack of a pass didn't really stop me from being with everyone else due to me being AsianGlow for some of the time. I stuck with Phil/Charles for some of the time and they brought me along for some awesometastic fun.

Day 1 ended with me passed out on Dave's floor mumbling things that were hilarious according to those around me. This was the only time I got sleep at the event.

Sunday, June 20, 2010


People are disgusting.